Before inciting confrontation with another person try this.

First take a deep breath.

Look up at the sky

Make an attempt to laugh at the stupidity of the issue.

 

Still pissed?

That sucks

Take a second to think about what the issue is.

Is the problem heavy enough to make you resent the other person?

If resentment or hostility is growing from your issue

it is worth taking the time to resolve it.

 

What could possibly be going on in the other person’s head?

Make an honest attempt to answer this question.

I know this may be hard.

Because in your head the other person may be an idiot,

keep in mind though that in their head you may be an idiot too.

 

To understand where the other person is coming from

think of your actions and inactions critically.

Think of the minor interventions you could have made

to intercept the issue before it became.

 

Understand the things you could have done to prevent this negativity.

Be critical here.

 

Take another deep breath.

Still pissed?

Well dang, looks like we may need to talk.

 

What is the intent of our conversation?

What would a perfect outcome look like?

This is our goal.

 

When speaking to the person keep our goal in mind.

The intent is not to win the conversation

it is to achieve our goal.

 

Navigate the conversation with humility

take as much fault as is necessary to convey your message.

 

The other person may jab you and say things that hurt.

Breath through the negativity

happily understanding that our intent is not to win this conversation

it is to achieve our goal.

 

Once all has been said do not dismiss the conversation with hostility.

If it is someone you can hug

do that.

4 Comments